If your child has experienced or witnessed a traumatic event, it is important for you to talk to your child about what happened and how it makes them feel. Encouraging other family members to talk to your child and support them through this difficult time is also important. Parents’ support and understanding can make a big difference in a child’s ability to deal with the event.

Children pick up on attitudes and feelings of their parents, so parents need to get support. Talk to other adults on an ongoing basis to sort out your own feelings of anxiety and uncertainty.

Tips for Talking with Your Child

Tips for talking with your child and dealing with the event:

• Keep your interactions with your child brief until you’ve had a chance to collect yourself.
• Be honest with your child. Let them know that they are safe, but that you need time to gather your thoughts.
• Talk about the facts. However, don’t assume that children, especially those under age eight or nine, will really understand the facts about the traumatic event. They need you to put the facts into perspective.
• Let young children know that they, as well as their family members, are safe. With older children and adolescents, answer their questions about safety in more detail.
• Limit the amount of exposure to media images of the event. Parents can help by watching television with their children.
• Keep up with your family’s usual schedule (for example, take your kids to basketball practice as usual).
• Schedule a formal family meeting to discuss the facts and feelings in a calm, orderly fashion.
• Use your family traditions, beliefs, and religious practices, as well as your extended support network, as sources of  strength and as ways to find meaning and comfort.
• Follow your child’s lead for providing more information or talking about the traumatic event. Your child may need to discuss their thoughts on many occasions. Answer their questions honestly. Check in with your child and let them know you are available to talk.
• Talk to your child’s pediatrician if your child shows prolonged signs of stress. Although a certain amount of anxiety is to be expected, prolonged reactions may be a sign that your child needs mental healthcare.